“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” Helen Keller

I’ve been thinking a lot about life. About how people struggle. How so many choose to end their life as a result. I’m going to go out on a limb here: I’ve been there too. I’ve thought of how easy it would be to just end it. I believed that no one would care. I was really wrong. I know that now. And more and more, it bothers me to see people so adamant about taking their own life as a solution. Because…it’s not worth it. If you make the choice to stick through it, things get so much better. And I’m recently discovering such beautiful aspects of this world that I never even knew existed. Things that reaffirm my belief that suicide isn’t an option. That validate my thought that life is a beautiful thing, and it’s worth sticking out. With this in mind, I’ve decided to create a suicide checklist. I know, it sounds crazy. But it’s the kind of thing that people need to think about before they make such a decision.

So here it is. A list of things that must be done before someone can actually choose to take their own life.

1) Go somewhere. Somewhere that you have never been before. Somewhere that is totally different. If you live in the country, visit the city. Vice versa. Go to a beach. Go somewhere beautiful. If you’re willing to leave this world, you have to know all the beauty it holds.

2) Tell everyone. Every single person you love. Every person that has loved you. The ones that have hurt you. The ones you’ve hurt. The ones that don’t seem significant. Wear a sign that says you are going to take your life. Make sure everyone knows. If you’re willing to leave this world, you have to know the impact of your decision.

3) Talk to someone. Find someone who has felt the way you do, and survived it. Ask them questions. Ask advice. They will be willing to help you. If you’re willing to leave this world, you have to know what could be.

4) Find someone who is worse off than you are. There is always someone. Speak with them. Ask them questions. Get to know them, and to understand the way they see things. If you’re willing to leave this world, you have to know the reality of the situation.

5) Make a list. Write down every good thing that has ever happened to you. Every good person you have ever met. Every time you’ve smiled. Every good thing you’ve done for someone else. The name of every person you have ever come into contact with. And leave a blank. A huge blank, for your future. If you’re willing to leave this world, you have to know what you’re leaving behind.

Five steps. Five simple things to do before you make that decision. Before you choose to end your pain, your unhappiness. You’re going to make a permanent decision. It is irreversible. Don’t rush into it. You have time to complete this checklist. And chances are, it’ll change things. It’ll change your life. Believe. Stay strong. You can make it through anything.

I honestly believe that if every suicidal person completed these five things, they would certainly reconsider. I know it was these kind of realizations that saved me. That changed me. That made me the person I am today.

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“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” Helen Keller

8 thoughts on ““Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” Helen Keller

  1. I see what you’re doing here. That is to say, I get what you’re trying to say. But first off, these five things are not simple. Not only do they require a considerable amount of time, effort, and resources (which an individual seriously contemplating suicide probably would not have); but it is also impractical, if not a tad irrelevant. I suppose the relevance and practicality would depend partially upon the rational behind one’s intended suicide though. So there is that. But I mean, tell everyone? really? You’d be committed. Suicide is illegal, and let’s face it: people are selfish. They’d never let you do it. Even if you did complete this checklist and still had a valid reason and sound logic. The state of others is largely irrelevant as well. Granted, acknowledging that there are those less fortunate may offer you perspective. But to look at the world and see people whose lives suck even worse than your own would not make you want to live. In fact, it would more than likely just give you that much more incentive to kill yourself. Similarly, a list of the good things would probably do little more than offer some easily shattered perspective. Not that the good things in life should be taken for granted, but depending on the psyche of the suicidal individual, “good things” are of little consequence anyways. As far as telling someone, I suppose that could be helpful in terms of support. Or solidarity. Communication and all of that nonsense. I guess this list would really only apply to those hyper-dramatic individuals that have so “tragically” resolved to take their own lives for… no real reason in particular. Those ridiculous sob stories, “Woe is me, my girlfriend/boyfriend left me/cheated/died etc.” But situational suicide is easily talked down most of the time. (not to minimize the pain of others. ahem) This list would work wonders for those sorts of cases. But the well thought out, meticulously planned, rational, logical instances of suicide would only be reinforced by the items on this list, if anything. perhaps this is a sweeping generalization; one which I have no right to make. But in my own experience, and in the experiences which I have observed, any instance of an existential suicide are not so easily, and topically countered. Because the reality is this: Suicide most certainly IS an option. And a viable one, at that (as paradoxical or even oxymoronic as that may seem). I mean, just try to validate your own statements. To really validate them. Then you’ll see how difficult it is. Worth what? You say that “it just isn’t worth it” Worth WHAT? What does that even mean? And what does “worth sticking it out” mean? Why? Is there a consolation prize? A lottery? Some door prize drawing that you can only claim if you stick around till the end to put your name in the hat? Existentially speaking, there is a very sound argument for suicide. Albert Camus posed the question, “why not kill yourself?” His was the theory of Absurdism. But absurdism aside, what could possibly be the answer to that question? But really. None of that humanist blather about “worth it”, because those are empty words. Empty logic. No logic at all. I would never tell anyone to take their life. In fact, I’d do all I could to prevent it. But I can’t help but laugh when someone tries to do the same. None of us know why we are here. And none of us, for the most part, can TRULY rationalize our decisions to stay. Because that’s what staying is. It’s the decision NOT to kill ourselves. Most of us aren’t conscious of it. We make it by default, and close our eyes tight unless we should see the terrifying pit over which we all hang. Because if we see the pit, we become aware of the strain of holding on so we don’t fall, and how tired we are. And then we wonder why we don’t just let go, and we realize what all these philosophers have been going on about, and we realize that we don’t know the answer either. Not really. And well, that’s just downright scary, isn’t it? The world IS beautiful. Blissfully so. Because ignorance is bliss.

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    1. kelseyapperson says:

      Of course I understand what you’re saying. And I’m really glad that you took the time to state your position.
      I am no suicide expert, clearly. And I have no intention of claiming such. This checklist was aimed almost entirely at the very basic suicidal thoughts. And I think at some point, all suicidal thoughts begin very basic. I am more than aware that it is hardly realistic, or even attainable. In some sense, that’s the purpose. As of late, I have increasingly observed people who–much as myself–get caught up in the everyday difficulty. I’m not trying to downplay a person’s situation, nor am I trying to make my experience more than it is. I am a firm believer in perspective. I also think a lot differently than most people. So, was it wrong to generalize my experience? Absolutely. I would never actually give this list to someone who confided to me that they were suicidal, and tell them to be on their way. It’s merely a culmination of thought and experience. It’s purpose is rightly served, because it was a matter of making others think. And you have certainly thought about it, which satisfies me. You do indeed make some valid points, and I am grateful that you shared them. As for worth, I believe it does exist. No doubt that it varies. But essentially, each person assigns worth to everything. To other people, to elements in their life, to experiences.
      I have no intention of denying your brilliance. Because it’s clear to me that you have a great understanding of the situation. I do believe our views vary some, but I also respect your position.
      And yet again, I am incredibly grateful that you took the time to share.

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  2. It was any exhilaration discovering your website yesterday. I arrived here nowadays hunting new things. I was not necessarily frustrated. Your ideas after new approaches on this thing have been helpful plus an superb assistance to personally. We appreciate you leaving out time to write out these items and then for revealing your thoughts. 218546

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    1. kelseyapperson says:

      I apologize for not posting your comment or replying until now.
      I am so grateful for your kind words. I’m glad that you enjoy my blog, and I hope you continue to read my posts in the future.
      Thank you!

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    1. kelseyapperson says:

      I apologize for not posting your comment or replying until now.
      I’m glad you enjoy my writing style, and are so appreciative of me! I appreciate that you took the time to read and comment. And I am still so terribly sorry that I am just now getting back to you.
      Thank you so much.

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